About the crazy teen girl that lives in a crazy body that I call me

Friday, February 3, 2017

❤ Girl Talk--Loving God First ❤

Hey girlies!

So sorry I haven't posted on this blog in a while! I've been hanging out over on my other blog lately. It's called The Great Lakes Girl. I would love it if you would check it out! :))

Anyways, there's been something on my heart lately that I just really need to get out. It's actually something that I kind of just recently figured out by myself.

Lately I've been thinking a lot about relationships. *NO* I am not currently in one. And *YES* my friends have tried. Many times. And to be completely honest, I'm getting sick of it. I feel like modern girls need guys to give them a sense of completeness, and vice versa.

God created us with that longing to be whole, complete. He intended us to fill that place in our hearts with love for Him. Sadly, though, we fill that void with worldly things that give us temporary pleasure. Sex, drugs, money, nice clothes, popularity--we fill our hearts with anything and everything that makes us happy. Maybe I'm being a little bit drastic, but I know there is one particular thing that every single girl has had in the place of God at one point. Boys. Whether it be one particular boy or fifteen, we all want to be accepted by the opposite gender. We want to be loved, cherished, protected, and adored--which are all honorable desires. Our hearts long to have the perfect little relationship, filled with quirks and romance and all of the other things that we see on Tumblr or Pinterest or Instagram. Let me share a little bit of my story and my personal struggles--and, ultimately, how I overcame them.

Lately, I've been more thoughtful about marriage and dating, and I recently started praying for my future husband. I have three main prayer requests that I focus on. 1) That he is a Christian and that he would continue to grow in faith, love for Jesus, and love for the church. 2) That he would have a heart of self-control, be slow to annoyance, and that he would know how to manage his anger in a quick way. 3) That he would have a heart of integrity in the small things, so that way he can be trusted in the big things.

The other day, when I found myself struggling with my emotions, I remember thinking, When is God going to send me a godly guy? Then the words of the Duggar girl's book, Growing Up Duggar, came back to me: "What kind of person will attract a godly guy? The answer is, a godly girl." The realization washed over me like a bucket of ice cold water. In order to attract an honest, honorable, Jesus-loving guy, we need to be honest, honorable, Jesus-loving girls ourselves. We're not going to attract the right kind of guy with booty shorts, a crop top, and a flirtatious attitude. A strong, Christian guy will say "no" to those kind of girls and move on.

Now, I'm not saying that any of you have been walking around in immodest outfits or with inappropriate behaviors or anything like that. All I'm saying is that we need to praying for God to work in our own lives in the areas we struggle, just as we're praying for our spouses. We can't expect a perfect, God-fearing man to walk into our lives if we are still "spiritual babies". (1 Peter 2:2-3.) Any type of compatibility is important in a relationship, but spiritual compatibility is the most important of all.

For a while now, I've liked this guy. At first I liked him for the usual girly reasons--he's athletic, good-looking, and has a nice smile. And then I started to look at the deeper things, and the attraction grew. He is a gentlemen, he is kind with his younger siblings, he is a strong Christian, and he treats girls with respect. I've been struggling with my emotions towards this guy because he is a couple years older than me, and I don't see it ever working out. But over the past couple days, I have felt God saying, "Love Me first. Love Me first, and then you will know how to love this young man in the way he deserves. Love Me first, and you will know how to love your spouse." I have felt peace. I am willing to wait for this guy, or any guy in the future. I am willing and ready to wait for my future spouse. I am learning to love God first. Yes, of course I still sigh whenever I see a cute couple on Pinterest. Occasionally I feel a strong need and want for that affection. But then I hear God say "Love Me first" and I am reminded that I am learning to love God so that way I can love my spouse. It can't be the other way around, because human love is twisted and tainted. Through God, love is pure. So love God first. Be willing to wait.

Love you girlies :))


Sunday, October 16, 2016

My Story

     A couple months ago, I struggled with believing in God. When I prayed, I doubted if He was even there, and I pushed important things like reading my Bible away. I didn't really care about growing or grooming my faith, and it overgrew into a tangled mess. I guess you could say that I lost my belief in God. I fell into a depression from there. I mean, if God didn't exist, then what was my purpose in life? I wasn't created on purpose. I was an accident. I wasn't special. I was the product of an explosion, of evolution.
    With the absence of God in my life, I felt something in my heart. It was like a hole that needed to be filled. Without God to fill that hole, I was incomplete. I felt like I needed to fill it with other things. Money, impressive clothes, a pretty face, a great body . . . all of these desires filled my heart. I wanted it all. I needed it all, I thought, to be happy. I was struggling through life, trying day-by-day to fill that void in my heart. It was like a bottomless pit. Nothing satisfied it, nothing made it happy. I thought that I was controlling myself, that I was steering my life into the direction that I wanted to go. Then I looked in the mirror one day and realized that I was spinning out of control. Actually, I had already wrecked.
    One day I was cleaning my room, and I came across this small little thing called The Life Book. I remembered picking it up at my youth group one day, and I began to read it. It was the book of John (with teenager friendly notes) inside this tiny little book. Slowly, I felt the hole inside me begin to be filled. I longed for it to be complete, I longed to be satisfied. I began reading my own Bible and I started to pray again. I was overjoyed to find that I had found my faith. It was never really lost to begin with. It was just covered up with other things.
      I am assured of my salvation because I have experienced what it is like to be without it. I understand that longing to be filled. That's how I know I am free from the bondage of sin. And I never, ever want to forget again.

Wednesday, August 3, 2016

Happy Birthday, Vi!


Violet is one?!? How on earth did that happen? Was it really a year ago that I was blogging about her arrival?

Ugh, that makes me so, so sad. And also, incredibly happy. I think the word to use to describe this event is bittersweet. 

Happy first birthday, Vi. I love you more than you could ever imagine.

I love you Violet. Please, don't grow up to fast. 

Saturday, June 18, 2016

The Truth About Me

The truth about me:

People think I'm quiet, but that's just because they don't know me.

I'm usually the person who's walking behind because the sidewalk because it isn't big enough for three.

My emotions are very strong 100% of the time.

I still listen and sing along to Disney songs.

I'm not a pretty cryer.

I hate fake friends.

I'm addicted to Pinterest.

When you insult me, I suck it up, but if you insult my friends . . . be prepared for me go all author-ninja on you (that means that I insult you to the best of my ability using big words).

I hate liars

I'm loyal

I'm honest

I'm incredibly weird

I hate being ignored

I text back fast

Sometimes I just sit on my couch contemplating time, space, heaven, God, and a whole bunch of other deep stuff.

I'm a bookworm

I'm a HUGE history nerd and usually win at 20 questions because no one in my family knows which historical person I'm talking about.

I don't wear makeup.

I think the best of people and it's hard for me to think bad about someone.

I'm a writer

I've resigned from having crushes. They only cause heartache.

I'm rebellious

I love stars

I don't like hurting people

I don't like hurting, period.

Thursday, May 5, 2016

I'm Going to California // Pictures // My Week // Ashley's Store Review!

Hey Guys!

I just thought I would sit down and write a good long post today describing my week and plans ahead. Enjoy!

So, next Monday, my Dad, my Mom, Violet and I are taking a trip to California for a week (more or less).


Why aren't we taking the whole family, you ask? 
Well, my Dad works for the city of Detroit, so he has to travel a lot as a representative-kind-of-a-thing. Anyways, he has this work conference thing in San Diego, CA. Since his and my mom's anniversary is coming up, he decided to bring her along as a present (oh, she's not the present . . . you know). And Violet is still small enough to where she can't go long without breastfeeding, so she had to tag along as well. She also is extremely loud and restless, so Dad can't bring her to his fancy work conference, right? So I'm coming along to babysit her while he's at his work conference. Plus it's my birthday on the 11th!! (But I'm mostly coming to babysit her.) 
So yeah! We'll be staying at a resort in San Diego. I'm super excited (and I promise, I will *try* to post every single day with pictures)!

But anyways, here's what I did all week . . . 

 Last Saturday~ At 9:30, I attended my youth group meeting . . . I went to my brothers' soccer games . . .  then I went over to my friend Lexi's house and we curled our hair, did makeovers, had a lip-synging battle, and just laughed and talked about stuff.

Sunday~ Attended Sunday School  @ 9:30 & church @ 10:45 (if you want to check out our church website & listen to sermons from my pastor, just click here). After church, we headed home to spend the day with my Grandma and Grandpa (I call them Mima & Papa). We barbecued & I put a special Mother's day video together for Mima (since next Sunday is crazy and we won't be able to spend it with them).

Monday~ I went shopping for CA with my mom and her friend/my youth group leader, Kristi at Old Navy. Well, actually, Mom was the one did most of the shopping. I just tried on sunglasses and made silly faces in the mirror. (Once I decided which pair I liked the best, I got them for $15. They are so cute!) Plus I got two pairs of flip-flops (teal and white). Now it's officially summer!
We went to DSW Shoe Warehouse and headed (naturally) to the Clearance section. I found the cutest pair of white wedges! And they were my size!! Plus they were 30% off of $69!! Unfortunately, they were a little too tall for my mom's taste. I was crushed (just kidding, I was somewhat disappointed). However, she's thinking about it, so I just may get them by Sunday! :D I'm hanging on to that hope... 
Anyway, then we went to Panera and I devoured Tortellini Alfredo. So good! 

Tuesday~ Tuesday was a boring day. I did school, ate, slept, and thought a lot. Which was nice, in it's own way. 

Wednesday~  Wednesday is always our crazy day. We try to squeeze in all of our lunch and school by 1:00, since our piano teacher, Mrs. Brudi, comes at 1:30. Yesterday my friend Maddie Langan (not Maddy Crone, the famous photographer :D Lol) came over and we practiced our duet together. Then, at 4:30, I left to go to SALT (student and leadership training). Then I helped set up for Torrid (the name of our youth group. Here's our Youtube Channel, Website, Instagram,  Twitter, and Flickr!) and we had an awesome night. We're learning about Hezekiah right now. 
Sammy is in Cubbies, Luke is in Sparks, and Caleb & Drew are in Stockade (or T&T--Truth and Training). Next year Caleb will be in Torrid with me. 
After that ended at 8:00, we went home. The rest of the night was semi-difficult for me because I had to tell somebody that I wasn't interested in a relationship with him . . . through text. :P it was difficult, but I prayed a lot, and God saw me through it. The guy took it pretty easily, so that was good. God is sovereign, I need to remember that. 
I played "Heart and Soul" by myself for a while, constantly shifting from the low part to the high melody and vice-versa. After that, I went up to my room and watched YouTube for awhile. Then I watched half of The Princess Bride (who doesn't love that movie??) and tried to go to sleep. I ended up drifting off at about 1 a.m., but those memories are foggy.

Thursday (Today) ~  It's been a pretty low-key day, like Tuesday. I don't like low-key days, but I need to remember to slow down every once in a while! It's good for the Soul to stop being busy and to just breathe. It's a beautiful day, too! I'll probably finish The Princess Bride and then I'll go out and jump on my trampoline.


So yeah! That was my week. Sorry if it was long! :) So, I promised picture, so pictures there shall be! (Lol.) Here you guys go . . . 

(Caleb plays soccer)

Sammy & his friend Ryder 

Violet being adorable . . . 

Caleb & Vi

Sweet Vi is asleep . . . awww!

Sammy's asleep :)

Luke showing us the baby toad he caught. Is it cute or ugly? I can't tell . . . 

Ruthie in her red pajamas . . . wearing a pink coat . . . and tennis shoes. Somebody needs to give this girl a lesson in fashion! Haha. So adorable! :D

Sammy completed Cubbies! So proud of my little Cubbie Sparkie!


Last but not least, I have a review for Ashley's store.

I ordered some fabric letters for Violet. They were made out of purple, blue, and white yarn, and they were adorable! The price was reasonable ($12). They were the perfect size for babies as they learn everything with their hands! My rating for Ashley's store is 5 stars. Good job, Ashley! :) 


So yeah! Thanks for enduring this terribly long post. Sorry it was so long! :P Love you gals!